Values and decisions

Faithfulness.

Yeah!

Caelans friend evelyn brought this over from her and her mom and aunt. The girls love littlest pet shops!!!!! They play with these everyday so this was a fun addition to their collection ;) thanks Tracy, Lynn and evelyn. ;)

More goodies.

More goodies from
Uncle Ed!

More Special things!

Uncle Ed is always sending things to the girls! It's so sweet! This time he sent a harmonica to Caelan to pass the time being in casts. She plays it all the time! Yowzers! Now we have a band going on! ;) thanks uncle Ed for the musical influence. We have lots of music going on around here! ;)

Special things.

My dad and Kathy sent up some books, word searches, and some other goodies for us. So sweet and thoughtful! The girls have been doing the puzzles a ton! So helpful!!!

Sweet Riley.

Riley has been so good about hanging out at home just chillin' her and Lola are such good buddies....

Ahead

Always must remember this.

God knows our needs.

Y'all

Hey y'all..... It was a better night last night. Caelan slept the night through..... So happy about this. Things are getting better bit by bit.

My sister.

Here are some photos of my sis and her dog stella. She posted these today and i wanted to share some ;)

Rough day.

Caelan was up all night. Eric and i have been taking turns sleeping.... He came to bed at 5am and I took over for the day. He woke up a little after 10am and left the house for a bit. It's good to get out and come back refreshed.... He and Darin went shooting ;) they had a great time and I took care of the girls. Caelan has been in a lot of pain! Swollen legs and feet so we've been icing her casts to penetrate inside to get the swelling down. It's been a hard day. Her friend Kate and Therese came over and watched "tin tin" with her and Riley so that was nice. It's been a hard day. Very hard.... We need prayers.... I can't go into much detail but Caelan needs prayer for some complications we've learned of.... I just can't go into it all, but just please pray..... Pray for healing. Pray for comfort..... Pray for wisdom for Eric and I in helping her through this time..... Thank you, to all who have reached out in support. This time has been so hard and we have so appreciated all who are reaching out to us in prayer and loving on us. It means more than u ever know.

First outing!

Our friends John and Lori invited us to the movies to take the kids and see the Lorax. We asked Caelan and she was on board fully to get out for a bit. We say in the front row and propped her walker on its side and elevated her les as much as we could..... The movie was terrific by the way! I loved it, we all did..... One of cutest movies in a long time with deep meaning too. I always dig deep and find a life lesson in movies and the kids always laugh but this movie encouraged them to bring out a story and lesson, which was neat to see.... Anyhow, it was so fun hanging with John and Lori, Brooke and avery. We always treasure the time with friends! Caelan did really well. She knows her limits though, which is helpful. We mentioned getting dinner and she said, "we'd better go home so I can lay down." it's so neat how grown up she is, she is very aware of things and it's been so helpful. She can communicate things about medicine and side effects.... And when she thinks the pain is coming back to be able to get medicine going again.... We've had the girls in surgery a few times and they were so little it was hard to "read" them and know what was working or not.... Now that Caelan is almost 9 it's quite a difference! She even decided last night it was a better idea to try and sleep in her own bed instead of with Eric downstairs in our bed.... And behold, she slept better. She is old enough to know what works and doesn't and what helps her best. ;) she woke up twice for pain medicine which wasn't too bad! She's so strong and brave and I'm learning she is ok handling pain to a certain degree. I have a pretty high pain tolerance and I'm learning Caelan is following that. That's encouraging because she has to endure a lot, life hasn't been easy for her..... so to be able to tolerate what comes her way is so awesome! We are so proud of her! We keep encouraging her and making sure she knows how awesome and brave she is! The thing that's been hard is the stares she has gotten, and the states we've got. It's not every day you see a kid with two casts, makes people assume she has two broken legs..... Today Caelan said, "why do people have to stare? Man, now I know how all the old people feel with their walkers, they must get a lot of stares"..... Her sweet spirit.... And her heart of compassion. She has always been so tender hearted, having to go through this is really proving her compassionate heart. She mentions over and over how
Hard this is and how she feels sad for people that go through this stuff..... She loves so hard, with every fiber of her being, she loves tenderly. She asked us, "why did i have to be born this way?" Eric told her sometimes we don't know why things happen, sometimes we learn along the way the reason for things.... Maybe if you think about it you might realize why, but the important thing is, you were made perfectly, just as God intended...." she responded, that it helps her realize what others feel and now she can help others, oh, and she won't stare at old people with their walkers. ;)

Trust.

Sigh.

Well, last night was bruttle. Caelan was in so much pain and so uncomfortable. I laid with her for four hours trying to get her to sleep before i gave up. I walked upstairs frustrated beyond belief and asked Eric to take over and I went in and laid with Riley. Caelan has been in our bed because her room is upstairs and we have to be able to carry her everywhere and we can hear her from anywhere else so one of us sleeps with her.... Which means one of us jumps in Riley's queen bed to sleep with her because she's feeling very jealous and left out.... Caelan has a lot of attention and Riley's really acting up!!!!! She's fussing about everything and whining and getting into a lot of trouble, her way to grabbing the attention. It's exhausting. So anyhow..... Needless to say it was a very long awful night.... Riley didn't sleep good and I woke up to a sore jaw, I grind my teeth when I stress and have a migraine like none other. We are all falling apart, basically...... Eric had to go in to work today which was that something that pushed me over the edge a bit. Lots of tears today... Well I figured I would figure out carrying Caelan if i had to, (I'm still recovering from my surgery a few weeks ago!)..... Well my cell phone rang super early and it was a call from Eric..... His truck broke down. We've had the truck for going on 3 years and havent had trouble with it, ever...... So, he was driving and it just died! He's super good with fixing and diagnosing and he has NO clue.... And of course we don't have triple A anymore because we are on such a tight budget.... Ugh!!!! Good news is his buddy was driving by and saw him and picked him up and drug the truck to the gas station, pushed it there.... So he got a ride to work and the truck sits helpless for now..... So, basically one more thing on top of our overwhelmed hearts and lives. :( praying its a very easy cheap simple fix..... We have money in the savings BUT that was being used for our downpayment on a house this summer..... So, if the truck is really bad off, we won't be able to buy a house..... It could be awful.... :( BUT we are going to trust and pray its an easy fix because God knows our needs and we need to move this summer.... Our living situation isn't all that great! And we would save money by paying the mortgage vs Renting because rent is so high in this house...... So we trust, it's all going to be ok! Please, Lord. Please Lord Jesus, comfort us in these very hard stressful times. Wrap your arms around us and carry us through..... Please take caelans pain away, and mine. We are both having such trouble recovering from surgery...... Help Riley, calm her spirits..... Give Eric strength to help us all. We know you are faithful to take care of us, and we trust in you..... amen.

Goodness.

Compete goodness.... Caelan asked to sit on Facebook for a little bit and play pet society. Yeah, this is a good sign..... We used the laundry basket tipped upside down to prop her legs up and keep elevated.... And of course therapy dog Lola is close by laying under the chair keeping watch. Love. Love. Love.

Day after.

Well, we are all pretty exhausted. Eric slept in our bed with Caelan, and I stayed with Riley in her bed.... Riley didn't sleep all that good..... And Eric said Caelan did "ok"..... Just taking it a moment at a time. Resting is on the agenda today. And keep Caelan as comfortable as possible..... The challenge is keeping her entertained and distracted from the casts and pain.....

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Discharge photos

Here she is in her "life is ruff" shirt. All set to go. Both hands sore from IV placements and two gone bad she's pretty bruised up. She's at home resting pretty comfortably, which is good..... Hoping the night goes ok and she can get some sleep..... And we can get sleepy its been a long day, very long. We are exhausted physically, emotionally and mentally spun. Hoping for rest for us all and praying her pain stays down. It's at a 5 on a scale of 1-10 with meds. Hoping we can keep on top of it so it doesn't go higher on the number Scale :(

Going home.

Well we are headed home as I mentioned on the other post..... Caelans IV had given out twice so they weren't able to give any meds IV so there really wasn't any reason to keep her there.... We are hoping we can control the pain as much as possible..... Keep praying please, we really need the prayers, this is a long hard road ahead of us.

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Checked out!

We are outta here! She went to the gift room and picked out a gift they gave her, a build a bear. A huge room filled and she said that bear caught her eye! ;) we are picking up Riley and heading home. So ready to get Caelan situated at home! Hoping we get the meds going quick. We have to drop the orders off still and we have an hour drive home...... Anyhow, just happy we are bringing her home.

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Red!

Red it is! She's had hot pink and blue so today she decided on red. ;) she also was given a new med for the nausea and it's working! She kept crackers down! We are really hoping she can go home soon. She really wants to go home. We were going to have her stay, and doc said she could but it's up to her and she wants to be with the dogs and snuggle with them..... And I get that!!!! Our puppies are such therapy dogs! ;) so we'll give it a bit longer and see.... But Eric and I are leaning towards bringing her home. Being at home always feels good, we just wanna make sure we can manage the pain and nausea.

Thankful!

Riley is at Amy and Kelly's and eric is on his way back. So thankful Amy and kelly were able to help with riley this afternoon. So anxious for Eric to Come back and help me, help Caelan.

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Ugh.

She's throwing up like crazy but they have already given her zofran..... This is awful. Poor kid.....
I can't wait for Eric to come back! I'm kinda losing it here..... Hard to carry all this alone here. :(

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Billionth update

Here's another update.... And something we'd like prayer for.... Caelan woke up throwing up.... They can't give her any more zofran because they already had given it.... Pray for her tummy to settle and calmness for her spirit. She's so sad. She's sad to be in casts as feels crummy. Pray for me cause I don't do well seeing my kids like this.... It's hard as a mom. Eric left to take Riley out of here..... We'll hopefully have Riley at amy and Kelly's soon then he'll be able to come back and help me with Caelan. It's tough stuff.

In recovery.

Still trying to wake up. ;)

Surgery is done!

Doc just came and talked to us! Surgery is done.... She is in recovery now. Thank you for the prayers! Things went as planned, text book case doc said, just as it all should have gone! Thank you Jesus!
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Nurse just called.

They just called us again in the waiting room. Things are going well! They are casting her legs now. Almost done. Hoping she does ok with the pain. Keep the prayers coming. So many prayers are being answered. Riley is doing great, thanks to her iPad! And she's being patient! We went to the cafeteria and got fresh fruit, cottage cheese an hard boiled eggs and a nurse paid for all of it cause she wanted to! Wow! So kind!!!!!! Things are going well. We are all exhausted from waking up at 4am but looking forward to watching a movie together and falling asleep! ;)
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More photos

Good news.

Dr Baird came out and told us, he's doing the surgery on the muscle. The arch looks ok. Once she was asleep with anesthesiologist he examined her because then the body was asleep and he could feel the tightness and do X-rays.... He Said the one muscle needs lengthened but that's it for now!
Such good news. Thankful for this huge answer to prayer!!!!!!!
The surgery will take two hours, so we'll see in a couple hours how it went. They update us each hour with a call in the Waiting room which is awesome! They keep in contact the whole time.

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Somewhat disappointing news

Well.... Dr Baird came in to talk to us while we have been waiting and they re-checked all her lab studies an X-rays and examined things again.....
Disappointing fact is that there is a very very good chance we are going to be doing a totally different surgery then we came here thinking we would be doing.... They are thinking they are going to do surgery on the ligaments in the arch of the foot, cast her for two weeks, then come back and check her range of motion, then go in again, and do the other surgery on the muscles..... They absolutely cannot do the ligament surgery and the muscle surgery at the same time..... It has to be done separate.
Dr Baird is going to have her put to sleep then he will come out and tell us which surgery they are going to do.....
We'll keep u all posted.....
Such a bummer that it is looking like two surgeries :( trusting God can do a miracle and only require one!!!!
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Getting all set.

Vitals. Scrubbing her legs. Hanging out playing the iPad..... Chatting with the anesthesiologist..... Smooth process..... Very organized here! Impressive but the wait has been longer than anticipated. We got here at a quarter to 6 this morning and the doc said hopefully by 8 or 8:30 she'll be in..... Another hour? Ugh. That's not too fun. The anxiety just has longer to build for Caelan and for us. ;( hoping things go quickly.

All checked in.

She's all checked in..... She's all dressed in her gown that is decorated with tigers all over it.... Riley is making us nutty talking up a storm and begging for food..... Hard carting her along today but oh well, we'll make it work somehow.....

Heavy hearted.

My heart is heavy but I'm reminded that God is in control. He has watch over our daughter and the doctors and the whole situation......
My heart is heavy. My heart is heavy that my little girl needs surgery. Heavy hearted that something isn't right and needs fixed.... As a mom, hearing this was a developmental thing when she was being formed in my womb, I get mamas guilt..... Thinking oh, I didn't do Pre natal vitamins because I was too sick.... I was on an IV the whole pregnancy and couldn't eat other than through the IV at home..... I feel guilt but then re-read over and over the biblical passages that speak on God forming her, just the way He wanted, she was formed perfectly, in His way..... We don't know why she has to go through this, but she does, and we do as a family..... We will learn from it, grow from it, and have been blessed by the outpouring support we have been given through all things! God is good.... he will guide us each day in this process and all the others to follow..... My heart felt heavy seeing her walk with the walker today, learning how to use it for after surgery and my heart ached hearing we have the walker until September!!!!! I thought to myself, wow we are in march, September is a long time away, wow..... This is a long process, and there is a long road to recovery.... Physical therapy will be long and extensive but, we will get through it all. I'm so thankful that we have an amazing Hospital, amazing doctors and amazing insurance..... Amazing that Shriners would have paid the bill had we not have full coverage...... So many beautiful things to see..... And what I've learned is it's not all ugly, situations may seem awful and grim but there is beauty in everything..... It's just how we choose to see things.....
Well, I'm gonna get sleep, it's going to be a long day tomorrow.... She checks in at 6am, we have to leave our house by 5am..... We are planning to have her stay one night in the hospital, we get to determine when she goes home! They refuse to kick any one out so if we feel her pain is managed and she is ready then we will bring her home. She has physical therapy scheduled tomorrow early night, so that will be to see if she is walking with the walker ok and the pain is under control..... They said this surgery is painful.... So main things is to help the pain levels stay down! And make sure she can walk ok......
Moment by moment, we will see..... Right now though it's time to try and sleep. And lay all the worries at Jesus' feet cause he tells me so! He tells us my to carry any burden..... So I will pray, and pray and pray, and try and try and try to not worry and to trust that he will help us, guide us, give us strength for each day..... And a peace like none other.
Good night and we'll be in touch.....
Please be praying.
Xoxox
-megs
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Last year in casts

Here are some photos from LAST year when Caelan was being treated at shriners..... She's grown up so much in a year. Hard to believe these were taken last year.......

Pre-op.

Fitted for her walker.... MERSA screening, tour of the hospital and surgery rooms..... Physical therapist testing and measurements.... Tons of stuff today. Very overwhelming day today!!!!!! Thankful for Lori who picked Riley up from school for us! Tomorrow is coming so fast..... Please pray for Caelan. Her doctors, nurses, all the details..... Pray for us, we are wrecks. Emotionally drained, mentally exhausted..... Pray for peace in our hearts. This is a huge surgery and hard on a mama and dad and a little young girl...... She'll wake up in full casts, and have a walker. We may have to have a wheel chair, it's up in the air still.... They said she goes home when we feel ready, they said she has a room tomorrow and the next day and each day after, no matter what not to feel overwhelmed with bringing her home if she isnt ready or if we don't feel she is ready. Pain is going to be tough, they are cutting the long muscles in her legs.... They cut the muscles and use the casts to stretch the muscles..... Then physical therapy to keep stretching the muscles and to build new strength in the legs after cutting the muscles..... Basically the surgery is required, the leg muscles didn't develop correctly in utero..... So since she began walking she walked on her toes to compensate for her under developed muscles..... It's sooooo complicated! And hard to explain. We've been taking her to Shriners for 2.5 years for therapy and castings.... They've tried all the options in trying to correct the muscles and nothing worked so this is the last option...... The problem is they know for certain they have to correct the log muscles in the legs but what they aren't sure about is the Achilles tendon.... They quite possibly might have to do a second surgery for that because Eric and I won't agree to do both at once..... Doing the Achilles tendon is a huge risk to her strength and endurance later on so no sense in performing an unnecessary surgery which will hurt her later in her athletic and mobility! So we are taking a risk..... BUT we are praying that it is just this surgery, and that God would heal the Achilles if this is something is wrong..... This is already such a huge surgery to go through and we don't want another surgery for her to have to go through....... Anyhow, pray for and with us! We will update tomorrow as things happen. Thanks!